Sample Letters of Intent
The following sample Letters of Intent illustrate how individuals can communicate their personal values, wishes, and priorities to the trustees and loved ones who will one day oversee their inheritance. Covering topics such as financial responsibility, education, health and well-being, and support for beneficiaries facing personal challenges, these examples demonstrate how a Letter of Intent can provide meaningful guidance beyond the legal provisions of a trust. While not legally binding, these letters offer an opportunity to share the experiences, beliefs, and hopes that can help trustees make thoughtful decisions and preserve a family’s legacy for future generations.
To Trustee or Executor
[Your Full Name]
[Your Address]
[City, State, ZIP]
[Date]
To My Trustee and/or Executor:
First, thank you for accepting the responsibility of overseeing my estate and the welfare of my family. I understand that this is both a privilege and a burden, and I trust that you will carry out my wishes with fairness, discretion, and compassion.
While my formal estate documents — including my Will and Trust Agreement — control the legal aspects of my estate, this Letter of Intent is meant to share my personal thoughts, values, and guidance to help you make decisions in keeping with my intentions.
1. Purpose and Guiding Principles
It is my hope that the wealth I leave behind will serve as a tool for growth, security, and opportunity, not as a source of dependency or conflict. My desire is that each of my children develop a sense of purpose, self-reliance, and gratitude, and that they use these resources to build meaningful lives and contribute positively to others.
2. Overview of Financial Accounts and Management
Please ensure that my financial accounts, investments, and assets are handled prudently and conservatively.
- Prioritize preservation of capital and steady growth over risk-taking.
- Engage professional advisors as needed — but require transparency, accountability, and ethics from all involved.
- Avoid speculative investments or ventures that serve only one beneficiary’s personal interests unless there is unanimous agreement.
If there are trust accounts for my children, I wish distributions to be based not only on financial need but also on demonstrated responsibility, effort, and personal development.
3. Guidance Regarding My Children
Each of my children is unique, with different strengths, challenges, and personalities. I ask that you approach each with empathy, fairness, and an understanding of their individual situations.
- [Child #1: Name] – [Describe personality, strengths, and challenges. For example: “Highly driven but prone to stress and overwork. Encourage her to balance ambition with rest and family life.”]
- [Child #2: Name] – [Example: “Creative and kind-hearted, though sometimes impractical with money. Please provide additional financial guidance and mentorship.”]
- [Child #3: Name] – [Example: “Struggles with addiction/behavioral issues. I ask that distributions for him be managed carefully — perhaps through a spendthrift or discretionary trust — and tied to progress in maintaining stability and health.”]
It is my strong wish that no child feels favored or penalized, but that each receives the kind of support that helps them become their best self. Equality of opportunity, not necessarily equal distribution, should be your guiding principle.
4. Education and Development
I value education deeply. Please ensure that funds are available for my children’s (and grandchildren’s) educational pursuits — whether academic, vocational, or artistic — as long as they show commitment and integrity in their efforts.
5. Family Values and Legacy
More important than money are the values I hope to pass on:
- Integrity and honesty in all dealings
- Generosity to those in need
- Respect for hard work and self-discipline
- Love of family and community
If possible, please encourage family meetings or gatherings where my children can stay connected, resolve differences with grace, and remember the importance of unity.
6. Charitable Intentions
It is my desire that a portion of my estate continue to support causes that reflect my lifelong values [list charities, foundations, or areas of focus such as education, healthcare, environmental causes, etc.].
You may also encourage my children to be personally involved in philanthropy, whether through volunteerism or financial giving.
7. Final Thoughts
I trust your judgment and compassion in carrying out these wishes. When in doubt, please act with fairness, prudence, and kindness, keeping in mind both the letter and spirit of my intentions.
Thank you for your service and dedication. My confidence in you reflects not only your competence but my belief in your integrity and care for my family.
With gratitude and trust,
[Your Name]
(Signature
Letter of Intent – Version 2:
(To Accompany My Estate Plan)
Date: [Insert Date]
From: [Your Full Name]
To: My Family, Executor, and Trustees
1. Purpose of This Letter
This letter is not a legal document but a personal statement of my intentions, values, and wishes to help guide the administration of my estate and care for my loved ones. It is meant to assist my executor, trustees, and family in understanding the spirit behind my decisions.
2. Message to My Children
My children — [insert names or “to all my children”]:
I want each of you to know that you are my greatest legacy. My love for you is unconditional and enduring. I hope that you live your lives with integrity, kindness, curiosity, and courage.
Use the resources I’ve left not as an entitlement, but as a tool to build lives filled with purpose and joy. Continue to learn, grow, and serve others. Support one another. Stay close as a family, even when life pulls you in different directions.
If you face difficult times, remember that you have my love and my belief in you. Seek wisdom from trusted mentors, friends, and one another. Choose generosity and gratitude — they will bring you peace.
3. Guidance on Distribution Timing
I believe that wealth should be used wisely and gradually, to encourage responsibility and maturity. Therefore, I suggest the following milestone-based distribution schedule for the trusts or inheritance established for my children:
- Education Milestone: Funds may be distributed or matched to support higher education, trade programs, or professional training.
- Age Milestones:
- Up to age 25: Distributions should focus primarily on education, living needs, or emergencies.
- At age 30: A portion (e.g., one-third) may be distributed outright if the trustee believes the recipient demonstrates sound judgment.
- At age 35: An additional portion (e.g., another third) may be released.
- At age 40: The remaining balance may be distributed outright, unless ongoing trust management is advisable.
- Achievement Milestones: Trustees may authorize additional distributions for significant life events — marriage, birth/adoption of a child, home purchase, or starting a business — provided the request aligns with responsible financial behavior.
4. Safeguards and Special Considerations
If any child struggles with addiction, serious debt, or behavioral or financial instability, I authorize the trustee to exercise full discretion in withholding, delaying, or conditioning distributions.
The trustee may:
- Direct funds toward therapy, counseling, or recovery support instead of direct cash distributions.
- Use a matched-savings approach, providing funds that match the beneficiary’s own earnings or savings efforts.
- Continue distributions in kind (e.g., paying rent, tuition, or medical costs directly) until stability is achieved.
These measures are intended not as punishment, but as protection and encouragement toward recovery, independence, and long-term well-being.
5. Summary of Accounts and Advisors (Optional – to be updated periodically)
| Account/Entity | Institution | Contact Person | Notes |
| Checking/Savings | [Bank Name] | [Advisor/Banker Name] | Primary household funds |
| Investment Accounts | [Firm Name] | [Financial Advisor Name] | Managed portfolio |
| Retirement Accounts | [Firm Name] | [Advisor Name] | 401(k)/IRA |
| Life Insurance | [Company Name] | [Agent Name] | Policy #[number] |
| Estate Attorney | [Law Firm Name] | [Attorney Name, Contact Info] | Estate planning documents |
| CPA/Accountant | [Name, Firm] | [Contact Info] | Tax and accounting matters |
(Please verify and update these details as needed.)
6. Final Thoughts
Above all, I want you to remember that my estate is not about money — it’s about values, love, and the life we’ve shared. I trust that you will carry forward these principles and support one another through every chapter of life.
With gratitude and trust,
[Your Signature]
[Your Printed Name]
A Letter of Intent (LOI) is a preliminary, typically non-binding document that outlines the principal terms and conditions under which parties intend to enter into a formal agreement
- Clarifies key terms and expectations at an early stage
- Demonstrates a genuine intent to proceed with the proposed transaction or relationship
- Facilitates alignment of objectives prior to drafting a definitive agreement
- Minimizes misunderstandings and streamlines negotiations
- Serves as a framework for the preparation of the final contract
- Enhances transparency, credibility, and professionalism between parties
The Values That Built Our Family: Hard Work, Responsibility, and the Meaning of Success
To My Trustee, My Children, and Future Generations
My Dear Children,
As I consider the inheritance I will one day leave behind, I find myself thinking less about the money I have accumulated and more about the experiences that made it possible.
I did not grow up with substantial wealth.
There were times when money was scarce, when bills had to be carefully managed, and when purchasing something we wanted meant postponing something else.
I learned early in life that financial security was not something to be taken for granted.
It required work, discipline, patience, and sometimes sacrifice.
I remember the satisfaction of earning my first paycheck. I remember saving for things I could not immediately afford. I remember making financial mistakes and having to live with the consequences.
I also remember the uncertainty of taking risks, the disappointment of setbacks, and the satisfaction of eventually accomplishing things that once seemed beyond my reach.
Looking back, I recognize that those experiences gave me something far more valuable than money.
They gave me confidence in my ability to overcome challenges.
They taught me that I could make a difference in my own circumstances through effort, judgment, and perseverance.
And they helped me develop the values that have guided much of my life.
Those are the values I hope to pass along to you.
I have created this trust to provide you with financial security and opportunities that I did not always enjoy.
But I want you to understand that my greatest wish is not simply that you inherit my wealth.
I want you to inherit the qualities that made it possible to create that wealth in the first place.
The Value of Work
I have always believed that work is about much more than earning money.
Work provides purpose, structure, responsibility, and the satisfaction of contributing something of value.
There is a particular sense of pride that comes from knowing you have accomplished something through your own efforts.
I want each of you to experience that pride.
I do not expect everyone to pursue the same profession or measure success by the size of a paycheck.
Some of you may become business owners, professionals, teachers, artists, or pursue entirely different paths.
I respect those choices.
But I hope you will always find something worthwhile to which you can devote your abilities and efforts.
I believe that a life without responsibility or purpose can become surprisingly empty, regardless of how much money someone possesses.
I therefore ask my trustee to encourage beneficiaries to pursue meaningful work, education, training, or other productive endeavors consistent with their abilities and circumstances.
I do not want this inheritance to become a substitute for personal ambition.
I want it to help you accomplish things that might otherwise be beyond your reach.
The Satisfaction of Earning Something Yourself
One of the greatest pleasures in my life has been the satisfaction of accomplishing goals that initially seemed difficult or even impossible.
I have learned that the things we work hardest to achieve often become the things we value most.
I worry that inherited wealth can sometimes deprive people of that experience.
When money is readily available, it becomes easy to purchase something without appreciating what it would have taken to earn it.
I do not want you to feel that everything you desire should immediately be provided simply because the trust has sufficient resources.
There is value in saving for something.
There is value in postponing gratification.
And there is value in discovering that you are capable of accomplishing something without financial assistance.
I would be pleased if the trustee occasionally encouraged a beneficiary to contribute personal savings toward a significant purchase or demonstrate a meaningful commitment to an opportunity before substantial trust resources are provided.
My intention is not to make life unnecessarily difficult.
It is to preserve the satisfaction that comes from personal accomplishment.
I hope you will understand that there is a difference between receiving an opportunity and having every obstacle removed from your path.
Financial Responsibility and Living Within Your Means
I have known people who earned substantial incomes yet never achieved financial security.
I have also known people of modest means who accumulated meaningful savings through discipline and thoughtful decisions.
Those experiences taught me that financial security depends upon more than how much money we earn.
It depends upon how we manage what we have.
I hope you will develop the habit of living within your means, saving for the future, and distinguishing between things you need and things you merely want.
I do not believe there is anything wrong with enjoying the comforts that money can provide.
I certainly hope you will enjoy your lives.
But I have also learned that constantly increasing one’s lifestyle to match available financial resources can become a trap.
There will always be a larger house, a more expensive automobile, or another luxury that seems desirable.
I want you to appreciate what you have rather than continually measure your happiness by what you can purchase.
I ask my trustee to consider a beneficiary’s overall financial circumstances and spending habits when evaluating requests for substantial discretionary distributions.
I would be reluctant to see trust assets repeatedly used to support extravagant spending that bears little relationship to the beneficiary’s long-term financial well-being.
At the same time, I recognize that reasonable people have different lifestyles and priorities.
I do not expect the trustee to impose my personal spending habits upon every beneficiary.
I simply ask that financial assistance encourage responsible decisions rather than undermine them.
Responsibility Means Accepting Consequences
One of the most important lessons I learned was that my decisions had consequences.
When I made a poor financial choice, I could not always expect someone else to make me whole.
When I failed to prepare adequately, I sometimes lost an opportunity.
When I took a risk that did not work out, I had to accept responsibility and determine how to move forward.
Those experiences were not always pleasant.
But they taught me judgment.
I want my children and grandchildren to understand that personal responsibility is an essential part of becoming independent.
I would be concerned if the trust repeatedly rescued a beneficiary from the consequences of avoidable decisions without any expectation of change.
There may be circumstances when financial assistance is appropriate, even when a beneficiary has made a serious mistake.
I do not believe one poor decision should define a person’s future.
But I hope the trustee will consider whether the assistance being provided is helping the beneficiary become more responsible or merely allowing the same behavior to continue.
Sometimes providing additional money is the right decision.
Sometimes helping a beneficiary develop a budget, obtain financial counseling, or establish a plan for recovery may be far more valuable.
And sometimes the most responsible decision may be to decline a request.
I recognize that these judgments can be difficult.
I trust that you will approach them with fairness, compassion, and a genuine desire to promote the beneficiary’s long-term well-being.
Opportunity Is More Valuable Than Entitlement
I have created this trust because I want my descendants to have opportunities that might otherwise be unavailable to them.
I would be delighted to see trust resources used for education, professional training, responsible business ventures, the purchase of a first home, or other opportunities that contribute to financial independence and personal development.
I would also welcome assistance during unexpected hardships, including illness, disability, unemployment, or other circumstances beyond a beneficiary’s reasonable control.
These are precisely the kinds of circumstances in which I believe inherited wealth can provide tremendous value.
But I want beneficiaries to distinguish between an opportunity and an entitlement.
An opportunity allows someone to accomplish something.
An entitlement can create the expectation that someone else will always provide what is desired.
I hope the trust will encourage the first without unintentionally creating the second.
I do not want my descendants to approach the trustee as though the existence of substantial assets automatically justifies every requested distribution.
I want them to consider whether the proposed use of those assets will improve their lives in a meaningful and lasting way.
Character Matters More Than Financial Success
Although I have placed considerable emphasis upon hard work and financial responsibility, I want to make something very clear.
I do not believe that wealth is the ultimate measure of a person’s success.
Some of the finest people I have known have never accumulated substantial financial assets.
They have been honest, dependable, generous, hardworking individuals who cared deeply about their families and communities.
I admire those qualities.
I would rather see my children become people of integrity and good character than become wealthy through dishonesty or exploitation.
I hope you will keep your promises, honor your commitments, and treat people fairly.
When you make a mistake, acknowledge it.
When you succeed, remain humble.
And when someone helps you along the way, remember their kindness.
I have always believed that your reputation is one of the most valuable things you possess.
Money can be lost and earned again.
A damaged reputation may be much harder to restore.
I ask my trustee to remember that the purpose of this inheritance is not simply to encourage financial achievement.
It is to support the development of responsible, honorable, and capable individuals.
Gratitude and Humility
I am proud of what I have accomplished, but I also recognize that no one succeeds entirely on their own.
Throughout my life, I have benefited from the encouragement, generosity, and assistance of others.
There were people who gave me opportunities, shared their knowledge, believed in my abilities, and helped me when I needed it.
I hope you will remember that your inheritance is itself an extraordinary advantage.
You will have opportunities that many hardworking and deserving people may never receive.
Do not allow that advantage to become a source of arrogance.
Treat people with respect regardless of their financial circumstances.
Be grateful for what you have.
And remember that financial success does not make anyone more deserving of dignity or kindness than someone who has struggled.
I would be disappointed if our family’s wealth ever became a reason for anyone to feel superior to others.
I hope it will instead provide opportunities for generosity, compassion, and service.
Helping Others Without Creating Dependency
I believe that generosity is an important responsibility of those who have been fortunate.
I have always found satisfaction in helping people who are working to improve their circumstances.
Sometimes a relatively modest amount of financial assistance can make an extraordinary difference in someone’s life.
It can help a student complete an education, enable a family to recover from an unexpected hardship, or provide the initial resources necessary to pursue a promising opportunity.
I hope you will be generous.
But I also believe there is a difference between helping someone become more independent and creating a situation in which they become increasingly dependent upon assistance.
I want our family’s generosity to be thoughtful.
Whenever possible, I hope you will look for ways to provide opportunities that allow others to improve their own circumstances.
That may involve financial assistance, mentorship, education, employment, or simply sharing the knowledge and experience you have acquired.
I do not expect every act of kindness to produce measurable financial results.
Sometimes people simply need help.
But I hope our family’s approach to generosity will reflect both compassion and responsibility.
The Importance of Family
There is something else I want you to understand.
I did not work hard simply to accumulate money.
I worked hard because I wanted to provide a better life for the people I love.
My family has always been one of the principal reasons for my efforts.
There were times when I made sacrifices because I believed those sacrifices would create opportunities for you.
Looking back, I also recognize that work sometimes took time away from the very people I was working to support.
If there is one lesson I hope you will take from that experience, it is that financial success should never become more important than the relationships that give life meaning.
I want you to work hard and pursue your ambitions.
But I also want you to spend time with your families, enjoy your children, and appreciate the people who matter most.
There is little satisfaction in accumulating substantial wealth if doing so causes you to neglect the relationships you value.
I hope this inheritance will eventually provide you with the financial freedom to enjoy those relationships more fully.
What I Ask of My Trustee
I recognize that administering this trust may require you to balance competing considerations.
I want you to encourage hard work, financial responsibility, and personal independence.
But I do not want you to become so rigid in applying those principles that you overlook a beneficiary’s individual circumstances.
Not everyone will enjoy the same opportunities.
Not everyone will possess the same abilities.
And not everyone will experience financial success despite sincere effort.
I do not want the trust to become a contest in which beneficiaries are judged solely by their earnings, professional accomplishments, or accumulated wealth.
I ask that you consider effort, responsibility, judgment, and character, along with the beneficiary’s actual needs and circumstances.
I would welcome financial assistance that helps a beneficiary pursue education, establish a career, recover from hardship, or develop greater independence.
I would be more cautious about repeated distributions that simply finance an extravagant lifestyle or allow a capable beneficiary to avoid reasonable personal responsibilities.
I also recognize that circumstances may arise in which the most compassionate and appropriate decision is to provide assistance without attaching expectations.
Illness, disability, caregiving responsibilities, and other significant challenges may require a different approach.
Please use your judgment.
I have not created this trust to impose a single definition of success upon every descendant.
I have created it to preserve opportunities while encouraging the values that I believe contribute to a meaningful life.
My Final Message to My Children
My children, I hope you will never interpret this letter as a demand that you live exactly as I have lived.
The world you inhabit is different from the world in which I grew up.
You will face opportunities and challenges that I could never have anticipated.
You may make choices that I would not have made.
That is part of living your own life.
I do not expect you to agree with every belief I hold.
But I hope you will understand the experiences that shaped those beliefs.
I know what it feels like to struggle financially.
I know what it feels like to work toward something that seems beyond reach.
And I know the satisfaction of eventually accomplishing something through perseverance and effort.
Those experiences helped make me who I am.
I cannot give you those experiences simply by leaving you money.
But I hope I can encourage you to develop the same confidence, discipline, and sense of responsibility that those experiences gave me.
I want you to enjoy your inheritance.
I want it to provide security and opportunities for you and your children.
But I never want it to diminish your ambition, independence, or appreciation for the things you accomplish through your own efforts.
My greatest wish is not that you become wealthy because of what I leave you, but that you become capable, responsible, and honorable individuals because of the values I have tried to teach you.
If the trust helps you accomplish those things, then the wealth I have accumulated will have served a purpose far greater than simply providing financial security.
It will have helped preserve the values upon which our family was built.
The Importance of Health, Happiness, and Personal Well-Being
My Dear Children,
Of all the things I wish for you in life, few are more important to me than your health, happiness, and overall well-being.
Throughout my life, I have come to appreciate that financial success means very little if we do not have the physical health, emotional stability, and peace of mind to enjoy it.
We spend so much of our lives working, accumulating wealth, and planning for the future that we sometimes overlook the importance of taking care of ourselves along the way.
I do not want that for you.
I believe that taking care of your physical and mental well-being is one of the most important responsibilities you have to yourselves and to the people who love you.
I hope you will make time for physical activity, proper nutrition, adequate rest, and the other habits that contribute to a healthy and fulfilling life.
I also hope you will recognize that emotional well-being deserves the same attention as physical health.
There may be times when life becomes overwhelming, when relationships become difficult, or when professional and personal responsibilities create more stress than we realize.
I want you to feel comfortable seeking help, whether through counseling, therapy, medical care, or simply taking time away from your responsibilities to restore a sense of balance.
There should be no shame in acknowledging that we sometimes need support.
I also believe that happiness is not simply the absence of illness or adversity.
It comes from having meaningful relationships, pursuing interests that bring us satisfaction, enjoying time with family and friends, and finding a sense of purpose in our daily lives.
I hope you will make room for those things.
Travel, explore the world, pursue hobbies, spend time outdoors, and enjoy experiences that enrich your lives.
Do not become so consumed by your careers or financial responsibilities that you forget to enjoy the life you are working so hard to build.
I would rather see you live a healthy, balanced, and fulfilling life than accumulate additional wealth at the expense of your physical or emotional well-being.
My Wishes to the Trustee
To my trustee, I ask that you recognize the importance I place upon the health, happiness, and overall well-being of my beneficiaries.
I would welcome appropriate distributions that support preventive healthcare, physical fitness, nutrition, mental healthcare, counseling, rehabilitation, and other services that contribute to a beneficiary’s well-being.
I would also encourage you to consider expenditures that promote a healthy and balanced lifestyle, including recreational activities, wellness programs, meaningful travel, and opportunities for personal development.
I do not expect you to determine which lifestyle choices are best for every beneficiary.
Nor do I want you to impose your personal standards of physical fitness, diet, or emotional well-being upon them.
I recognize that every person has different abilities, circumstances, and interests.
What contributes to one person’s well-being may be entirely different from what benefits another.
My intention is not to require beneficiaries to follow a particular exercise routine, maintain a certain weight, or demonstrate that they are living according to my personal preferences.
Rather, I want you to have the flexibility, within the authority granted by the trust agreement, to support activities and services that reasonably contribute to their physical and emotional health.
I would also encourage you to recognize that sometimes the most beneficial use of trust resources may be to relieve unnecessary stress.
Financial assistance that allows a beneficiary to reduce excessive working hours, take time to recover from an illness, care for a family member, or pursue a healthier balance between work and personal life may provide far greater value than an additional investment account.
Please remember that the purpose of this inheritance is not simply to preserve and accumulate wealth.
It is to improve the lives of the people I love.
My Final Thoughts
My children, I hope you will never measure the success of your lives solely by your professional accomplishments or financial achievements.
I want you to be successful, but I also want you to be healthy.
I want you to be ambitious, but I also want you to experience peace of mind.
I want you to work hard, but I also want you to enjoy the rewards of your efforts.
And I want you to recognize that taking care of yourselves is not selfish. It allows you to be more present for your families, your friends, and the people who depend upon you.
If the inheritance I leave behind allows you to live with less stress, enjoy better health, spend more time with those you love, and pursue experiences that bring meaning and happiness to your lives, then I will consider it money well spent.
My greatest wish is not simply that you live a prosperous life, but that you live a long, healthy, happy, and meaningful one.
The Gift of Lifelong Learning: Education, Exploration, and Personal Growth
My Dear Children,
I have always believed that education is one of the most important investments we can make in ourselves and in our children.
But when I speak of education, I am not simply referring to attending college, earning a degree, or obtaining professional credentials.
I believe education is a lifelong journey of discovery, learning, and personal development.
I want you to experience the world, understand different cultures, develop new skills, and pursue interests that challenge you intellectually and personally.
I want you to have the freedom to explore subjects that fascinate you, even when those subjects have no obvious connection to earning a living.
For that reason, I have intentionally defined education broadly in the trusts I have established.
I would be pleased to see trust resources used not only for tuition and books, but also for the reasonable living expenses, transportation, technology, travel, and other resources that make educational opportunities possible.
If attending a particular university requires an apartment and an automobile, I would welcome the trustee’s consideration of those expenses.
If one of my grandchildren has an opportunity to study in another country, learn a foreign language, participate in scientific research, or pursue specialized training in music or the arts, I would be delighted to see the trust help make that possible.
I would also welcome support for internships, apprenticeships, and other opportunities that provide valuable experience even when they offer little or no compensation.
And I do not believe education should end when someone graduates from college.
If, at age fifty, you decide to learn another language, pursue a new profession, study history, or return to school simply because you have developed a new intellectual interest, I hope the trust will support those ambitions.
I have not created this trust simply to help you earn more money.
I have created it to help you become more knowledgeable, capable, independent, and fulfilled individuals.
I ask my trustee to approach educational expenditures with generosity, flexibility, and an appreciation for the tremendous value of lifelong learning.
I do not want educational opportunities denied simply because they do not fit a traditional definition of schooling.
At the same time, I expect reasonable judgment. My desire to encourage education should not become an excuse for extravagant personal spending that has little genuine educational purpose.
My greatest wish is that you never stop learning, never lose your curiosity, and never allow financial limitations to prevent you from pursuing worthwhile opportunities to expand your knowledge and experience.
If my inheritance helps accomplish those things, I will consider it one of the finest uses of the wealth I leave behind.
To My Trustee: Guidance for Supporting a Beneficiary Living With Addiction
Dear Trustee,
Of all the responsibilities I have entrusted to you, I recognize that administering the trust for my child may be among the most difficult.
I have spent much of my life loving, supporting, worrying about, and trying to help my child through the challenges of addiction.
There have been periods of tremendous hope, when I believed that recovery was finally taking hold and that a healthier, more stable future was within reach.
There have also been periods of disappointment, fear, and heartbreak.
I have witnessed promises made with genuine sincerity and then broken. I have seen periods of remarkable progress followed by setbacks that seemed to erase months or years of effort.
At times, I have struggled to understand whether providing financial assistance was helping my child recover or unintentionally making it easier for the addiction to continue.
I have not always made the right decisions.
Sometimes I provided money because I wanted to believe that this time would be different.
Sometimes I gave in because I was exhausted by the arguments, the urgency, or the fear of what might happen if I refused.
And sometimes I withheld assistance only to wonder whether I had made matters worse.
I share these experiences not to discourage you, but to help you understand the responsibility I am placing in your hands.
I know this will not be easy.
I do not expect you to accomplish what I, as a loving parent, have sometimes been unable to accomplish.
I do not expect you to cure my child’s addiction, prevent every relapse, or guarantee a successful recovery.
But I do ask you to protect my child’s financial future while providing the support necessary to pursue a healthier and more meaningful life.
My intention is simple: I want this inheritance to help my child live, recover, and flourish. I never want it to become a financial resource that contributes to their destruction.
My Love Is Unconditional. Financial Distributions Are Not.
Before discussing the restrictions, I hope you will observe, there is something I want to make absolutely clear.
I love my child without reservation.
That love does not depend upon sobriety, financial responsibility, employment, or the ability to meet anyone else’s expectations.
My child is a human being with talents, dreams, relationships, and a future that deserves to be protected.
Addiction does not erase those qualities.
I do not want the trust administered as though my child has forfeited the right to compassion, dignity, or financial security because of this illness.
At the same time, I have learned that loving someone does not require providing everything they ask for.
There is a difference between helping someone and enabling behavior that may cause them harm.
I want you to remember that distinction.
I do not want unrestricted distributions made simply because my child demands them, promises they will be used responsibly, or insists that withholding money demonstrates a lack of love or trust.
Your responsibility is not to satisfy every immediate request.
It is to protect my child’s long-term well-being.
There may be times when saying no is the most compassionate decision you can make.
Why I Have Chosen to Leave These Assets in Trust
I have deliberately chosen not to leave my child’s inheritance outright.
This decision was not made out of anger, disappointment, or a desire to punish.
It was made out of love and concern for the future.
I know how quickly substantial financial resources can disappear when addiction interferes with judgment.
I also recognize that sudden access to large sums of money may create dangers far more serious than financial loss.
Money can sometimes provide the means to purchase substances, sustain harmful relationships, avoid treatment, or engage in dangerous behavior.
I cannot bear the thought that the wealth I accumulated to provide security for my child might instead contribute to serious injury or death.
That is why I have placed these assets under your care.
I want the trust to provide stability, shelter, treatment, and opportunity.
I do not want it to become an unlimited source of cash.
Where permitted by the trust agreement, my strong preference is that necessary expenses be paid directly to the individuals or organizations providing the goods and services.
I would favor direct payment of rent, utilities, insurance, medical bills, treatment expenses, and other legitimate needs rather than unrestricted distributions during periods when addiction presents a significant financial risk.
I recognize that even direct payments require judgment and may not eliminate every risk.
But I believe this approach can substantially reduce the possibility that trust assets will be used in ways that undermine recovery.
The Importance of Treatment and Recovery
I want you to understand that I place tremendous value upon providing access to appropriate treatment.
I would welcome trust expenditures for qualified addiction treatment professionals, rehabilitation programs, outpatient services, counseling, psychiatric care, medications, recovery support, and other evidence-based services that may assist my child.
I also recognize that different people respond to different forms of treatment.
What works for one person may not work for another.
I do not want you to insist upon a particular treatment philosophy simply because it is familiar to you.
I encourage you to seek guidance from qualified professionals who understand addiction and the beneficiary’s individual circumstances.
Where appropriate, I would welcome the involvement of an independent care manager or other experienced professional who can help coordinate services and advise you regarding available resources.
I do not expect you to become an addiction specialist.
Your responsibility is to recognize when professional assistance is necessary and to obtain it.
I also want you to understand that recovery may require substantial time and resources.
There may be occasions when a treatment program is expensive or when additional care is necessary after an earlier effort has been unsuccessful.
I do not want you to reject appropriate treatment simply because previous efforts did not produce lasting recovery.
If qualified professionals believe that a particular course of treatment is reasonable and beneficial, I would encourage you to give that recommendation serious consideration.
Relapse Should Not Mean Abandonment
I recognize that relapse may be part of the course of addiction.
A return to substance use does not necessarily mean that previous treatment was worthless or that future recovery is impossible.
I do not want my child to believe that one relapse will result in permanent abandonment by the trust.
I would be deeply troubled if the trust withheld appropriate medical care, necessary shelter, or other essential support solely because my child experienced a setback.
At the same time, relapse may require changes in how financial assistance is provided.
A period of renewed substance use may justify closer financial supervision, more direct payments, additional professional involvement, or postponement of discretionary distributions.
I ask that you respond to these circumstances thoughtfully rather than emotionally.
Do not use financial restrictions to express anger or disappointment.
Use them to reduce foreseeable risks and preserve opportunities for recovery.
I hope you will always distinguish between protecting my child from financial harm and punishing my child for being ill.
Requests for Cash and Extraordinary Distributions
I anticipate that one of your greatest challenges may involve requests for money.
My child may present reasons that appear compelling, urgent, and entirely legitimate.
There may be requests for assistance with housing, transportation, medical expenses, business opportunities, repayment of debts, or other financial obligations.
Some of these requests will undoubtedly be genuine.
Others may be influenced by addiction, impaired judgment, pressure from third parties, or circumstances that are not fully disclosed.
I have learned that it can be extremely difficult to distinguish between them.
For that reason, I encourage you to establish consistent procedures for evaluating financial requests.
Where the trust agreement permits, I would favor direct payments to legitimate providers, verification of significant expenses, and reasonable review before approving extraordinary distributions.
I would be particularly cautious about large cash requests, loans to friends, payments to unfamiliar individuals, speculative investments, and expenditures that cannot be adequately explained.
I do not want you to feel pressured into making immediate decisions simply because my child insists that a situation is urgent.
Genuine emergencies should be addressed promptly.
But urgency alone should not eliminate reasonable financial safeguards.
When necessary, take the time to obtain additional information.
And if you reasonably conclude that a proposed distribution would create an unacceptable risk, I want you to feel comfortable declining it.
Emotional Pressure and Manipulation
There is another difficult subject I want to address.
Addiction can sometimes be accompanied by behavior that places tremendous emotional pressure upon family members and others who are trying to help.
There may be accusations, expressions of anger, appeals to guilt, or promises that circumstances will change if only additional money is provided.
My child may insist that you are being unfair, controlling, or unloving.
There may even be attempts to involve other family members in disagreements over distributions.
I know how painful these situations can be because I have experienced them myself.
I ask that you approach these interactions calmly and consistently.
Do not respond with anger, humiliation, or personal criticism.
But do not allow emotional pressure to override your fiduciary judgment.
I would encourage you to document significant requests and decisions, maintain appropriate professional boundaries, and avoid making exceptions simply to end a confrontation.
If the relationship becomes particularly difficult, I would welcome the assistance of a qualified professional who can help maintain constructive communication.
I also recognize that statements suggesting self-harm or other immediate danger must be taken seriously.
If my child appears to be in crisis, please seek appropriate emergency or clinical assistance.
Do not attempt to manage a potential safety emergency simply by approving or refusing a financial request.
Protecting My Child From Others
My concerns extend beyond the possibility that my child may misuse trust assets.
I am also concerned that others may attempt to take advantage of my child’s circumstances.
People struggling with addiction can become financially vulnerable.
They may be pressured into lending money, paying another person’s expenses, entering unfavorable agreements, or supporting relationships that are financially or emotionally harmful.
I ask that you be attentive to unusual requests involving third parties.
I would be cautious about substantial gifts, personal loans, guarantees, or transfers that appear inconsistent with my child’s ordinary financial interests.
I do not want you to interfere unnecessarily with personal relationships.
But I do want you to recognize that protecting the inheritance may sometimes require protecting my child from financial exploitation.
A Comfortable Life, Not a Life of Deprivation
I do not want my child to live in poverty simply because unrestricted access to money may be inappropriate.
I have created this trust to provide financial security.
I would welcome reasonable expenditures for safe housing, nutritious food, reliable transportation, medical care, clothing, education, recreation, and other expenses that contribute to a comfortable and meaningful life.
I also recognize that enjoyment and personal fulfillment can play an important role in recovery.
Appropriate travel, hobbies, fitness activities, educational opportunities, and healthy social experiences may contribute to my child’s overall well-being.
I encourage you to consider those expenditures when circumstances warrant.
My intention is not to deprive my child of life’s pleasures.
It is to provide those pleasures in a manner that does not unnecessarily jeopardize safety or financial security.
Encouraging Independence Without Creating Dependency
I hope that my child will experience sustained periods of recovery and increasing independence.
During those periods, I would welcome opportunities to pursue education, meaningful work, personal interests, and greater financial responsibility.
I do not want my child permanently defined by the most difficult periods of addiction.
People can recover.
People can change.
And people can develop the skills necessary to manage their lives successfully.
I would therefore encourage periodic reassessment of the financial safeguards used in administering the trust.
If my child demonstrates sustained financial stability, responsible decision-making, and an ability to manage increasing amounts of money safely, I would welcome consideration of greater independence, subject to the governing trust agreement.
However, I do not believe that greater independence necessarily requires distributing substantial assets outright.
The trust may continue to provide valuable protection even during long periods of recovery.
I ask that you balance my child’s desire for autonomy with the importance of preserving long-term financial security.
My Wishes Regarding Family Relationships
I recognize that addiction can affect the entire family.
Siblings, spouses, children, and other loved ones may have experienced disappointment, conflict, financial strain, or emotional exhaustion.
I do not want the trust to become another source of division.
Please avoid placing unnecessary responsibility upon other family members to monitor my child’s behavior or make difficult financial decisions.
I would prefer that the trustee and appropriate professionals assume those responsibilities.
I also ask that you respect my child’s privacy.
Information concerning treatment, relapse, medical care, and personal circumstances should be handled discreetly and shared only when appropriate and legally permissible.
My child deserves the opportunity to pursue recovery without every difficulty becoming a matter of family discussion.
A Message to My Child
My Dear Child,
If you are reading this letter, I want you to understand something that may not always have been easy for me to express.
I love you.
I have always loved you.
And nothing about your struggles with addiction has changed that.
There have been times when I was frightened, frustrated, disappointed, and uncertain about how to help you.
There have been times when I probably made mistakes.
Sometimes I tried too hard to solve problems that only you could address.
Sometimes I gave you money when I should have offered a different kind of help.
And sometimes I allowed my own fear to influence decisions that I wish I had handled differently.
I hope you will forgive those mistakes.
Everything I have done has come from my desire to see you healthy, safe, and happy.
The trust I have established is another expression of that love.
I know there may be times when you disagree with the trustee’s decisions.
You may feel that you should have greater access to the inheritance or that the safeguards I have established are unnecessary.
I understand those feelings.
But I hope you will recognize that I have not created these protections because I believe you are incapable of living a meaningful and successful life.
I have created them because I believe your life and future are too important to expose to unnecessary financial risks.
I want this inheritance to be available when you need help.
I want it to support your recovery.
I want it to provide opportunities for you to build a life that brings you satisfaction, independence, and peace.
And I want it to remain there for you, even if your journey includes setbacks.
You do not have to earn my love through recovery. But I hope you will use the opportunities this trust provides to build the healthiest and most fulfilling life possible.
My Final Wishes to the Trustee
To my trustee, I recognize that I am asking you to undertake a responsibility that may require extraordinary patience and judgment.
There may be times when you feel that nothing you do is appreciated.
There may be times when every available option appears imperfect.
And there may be times when you question whether the financial safeguards you have established are helping.
I ask that you remember that your responsibility is not to control my child’s life.
Nor is it to guarantee recovery.
Your responsibility is to administer the trust faithfully, preserve financial security, and provide appropriate support within the authority granted to you.
Be compassionate, but maintain boundaries.
Be patient, but do not confuse patience with unlimited financial assistance.
Be hopeful, but recognize genuine risks.
And when you are uncertain, seek the guidance of qualified professionals rather than attempting to resolve complex medical or behavioral issues alone.
I would rather see you decline an inappropriate cash request and offer meaningful alternative assistance than approve a distribution simply because saying no is uncomfortable.
I would also rather see you provide necessary treatment and support through repeated setbacks than abandon my child because recovery has been difficult.
Above all, remember that the inheritance is intended to serve a human being whom I love.
My greatest wish is that the wealth I leave behind will protect my child’s future, support the possibility of recovery, and never become the means by which that future is lost.
If you administer this trust with that principle in mind, you will have honored both my intentions and my love for my child.
With my gratitude and confidence,
A Loving Parent
A Letter of Wishes and Intent
Our Family Vacation Home: A Legacy of Togetherness
To Our Trustee, Our Children, and the Generations Who Follow
Dear Trustee and Our Beloved Children,
Of all the things we have acquired during our lives, few have brought us greater happiness than our family vacation home.
To someone outside our family, it may appear to be simply another piece of real estate. It has a market value, expenses associated with its ownership, and the potential to be sold like any other property.
But to us, it has always meant something much more.
It is where we spent some of our happiest times together. It is where we escaped the responsibilities and distractions of everyday life, enjoyed holidays and vacations, celebrated special occasions, and experienced the simple pleasure of being together as a family.
We remember the excitement of arriving, the familiar feeling of walking through the front door, the meals we shared, the conversations that continued late into the evening, and the laughter that filled the rooms.
We remember watching our children grow up there.
We remember the friendships, adventures, celebrations, and family traditions that became part of our lives.
And perhaps most importantly, we remember the ordinary moments that seemed unremarkable at the time but now mean so much to us.
As we have grown older, we have come to appreciate that the most valuable things in life are rarely the things we can purchase.
They are the people we love, the relationships we build, and the memories we create together.
Our vacation home has been a place where so many of those memories were made.
We are not leaving this home to our family because of what it is worth. We are leaving it because of what it means.
Our Intention That the Vacation Home Remain in Trust
We have deliberately arranged for our vacation home to be retained in trust following our deaths.
This was not an incidental decision, nor was it made merely for convenience in administering our estates.
It reflects one of our most deeply held wishes: that the vacation home remain available for the use and enjoyment of our children, grandchildren, and future generations for as long as reasonably practicable.
We do not want the property sold simply because doing so would produce a financial return or because dividing the proceeds would be easier than managing a shared family home.
We understand that the property may appreciate substantially in value and that selling it could someday appear financially attractive.
But we have never viewed the home primarily as an investment.
We view it as a place that brings our family together.
We want the trust to preserve that opportunity.
Accordingly, we have directed in the governing trust agreement that the vacation home be retained and administered for family use, subject to the exceptions and limitations expressly provided there.
We ask our trustee to understand that preserving the family’s opportunity to enjoy the property is an essential purpose of the trust.
It is not merely a secondary consideration.
Keeping the Keys in the Family
There is a simple expression that captures much of what we hope to accomplish:
We want to keep the keys in the family.
We want our children to feel that they will always have a place where they can return and enjoy the company of their brothers, sisters, children, and grandchildren.
We want our grandchildren to know one another.
We want cousins to develop friendships that last into adulthood.
We want future generations to share experiences that remind them they belong to the same family, even as their individual lives take them in different directions.
We recognize that families naturally grow apart geographically.
Children move away.
Careers and responsibilities change.
New families are formed.
And the opportunities to spend meaningful time together often become less frequent.
We hope the vacation home will provide a reason to come together.
Perhaps everyone will gather for certain holidays.
Perhaps families will spend summers together.
Perhaps grandchildren will develop traditions of their own.
We do not expect future generations to live exactly as we have lived or to preserve every tradition we established.
We simply hope the home will remain a place where new memories can be created.
We Want the Home to Be Used and Enjoyed
We do not want the vacation home preserved as a museum or a memorial to us.
We want it to remain a living, welcoming family home.
We want you to use it.
We want you to bring your children, invite appropriate guests, celebrate birthdays, enjoy vacations, and spend time together.
We want the home filled with life.
We would be disappointed if family members became so concerned about preserving the property that they stopped enjoying it.
Of course, we expect everyone to treat the home responsibly, respect its furnishings, and leave it in good condition for the next family member.
But ordinary wear and tear is part of living in and enjoying a home.
The purpose of preserving the property is not to keep everything exactly as it was when we were alive.
It is to allow the family to continue making the property part of their lives.
Fair and Reasonable Use
We recognize that sharing a vacation home among several families requires cooperation.
There will inevitably be occasions when more than one family wishes to use the property at the same time.
Holidays, school vacations, and other desirable periods may create scheduling conflicts.
We ask that the trustee establish, or authorize the family to establish, reasonable procedures for coordinating use of the property.
We would favor a fair reservation system, including an appropriate rotation of particularly desirable dates.
We also recognize that some children may use the property more frequently than others.
One family may live nearby and visit regularly.
Another may live across the country and visit only occasionally.
One child may enjoy extended vacations, while another may prefer shorter visits.
We do not expect everyone to use the property equally.
Nor do we believe that fairness necessarily requires identical use.
What matters is that each family has a reasonable opportunity to enjoy the home and that no individual or family branch unfairly dominates its use.
We encourage cooperation, flexibility, and consideration for one another.
The Financial Responsibility of Maintaining the Vacation Home
We recognize that owning and maintaining a vacation home involves continuing financial obligations.
These include real estate taxes, insurance, utilities, ordinary maintenance, repairs, property management, and the eventual replacement of major systems and improvements.
We also recognize that the financial responsibility for maintaining the home must be addressed clearly.
We do not want disagreements over money to undermine the very family relationships we are trying to preserve.
For that reason, we have considered two approaches to meeting the expenses of the vacation home.
The following are alternative provisions. The approach selected for our family’s trust is intended to govern the financial arrangements for the property.
Option One: The Trust Pays the Carrying Costs
Under this approach, our intention is that the trust bear the reasonable expenses associated with owning, maintaining, repairing, and preserving the vacation home.
We have provided, or intend to provide, sufficient financial resources within the trust to support this purpose.
We recognize that the expenses may be substantial, particularly as the property ages.
There will be ordinary annual expenses, such as taxes, insurance, utilities, maintenance, and property management.
There will also be extraordinary expenses, such as replacing a roof, updating mechanical systems, making structural repairs, or undertaking necessary renovations.
We would welcome the establishment of appropriate reserves for these anticipated and unanticipated expenses.
We do not want our children to feel compelled to sell the home because a major repair becomes necessary.
Nor do we want one child to feel financially burdened because another child is unable or unwilling to contribute.
Under this approach, our wish is that the financial responsibility for preserving the home rest primarily with the trust rather than with the individual family members who enjoy it.
We believe this arrangement will allow our children and grandchildren to focus on spending time together rather than debating the financial obligations associated with the property.
We ask the trustee to manage these expenditures responsibly, avoid unnecessary extravagance, and preserve sufficient resources for the home’s continued maintenance.
We also recognize that the trust’s financial resources are not unlimited.
If circumstances eventually make continued ownership impractical, we ask that the trustee follow the provisions of the trust agreement concerning the property’s future.
Our preference, however, is that the vacation home remain available to our family for as long as reasonably possible.
Option Two: Our Children Share the Carrying Costs Equally, Regardless of Use
Under this alternative approach, our intention is that our children, and eventually their respective family branches, share responsibility for the expenses of maintaining the vacation home.
We believe that preserving a shared family asset should involve a shared family commitment.
Our children have agreed to this arrangement, and we are grateful for their willingness to accept that responsibility.
We recognize that some of our children may use the home more frequently than others.
Some may visit regularly, while others may spend only a few days there each year.
Nevertheless, our intention is that the ordinary carrying costs be shared equally among our children, without regard to the amount of time each child or family branch actually uses the property.
The obligation to contribute is based upon the privilege and responsibility of preserving a shared family home, not upon the number of days spent there.
We believe this is an important distinction.
We do not want the home treated like a rental property, where each family member calculates the cost of every night spent there.
Nor do we want arguments over who used more electricity, who spent more weekends at the property, or who received greater financial value from their visits.
We want the family to approach the vacation home as a shared responsibility and a shared privilege.
Accordingly, we would expect the ordinary carrying costs, including real estate taxes, insurance, utilities, routine maintenance, and property management, to be divided equally among our children or their designated family branches, as provided in the governing arrangements.
We would also expect reasonable procedures for funding major repairs and capital improvements.
We recognize that each child may have different financial circumstances.
One child may be comfortable paying the annual contribution from personal resources.
Another may prefer, or need, to obtain funds from a separate trust established for that child’s benefit.
We have no objection to either approach, provided the use of trust funds is authorized by the governing instrument.
It makes no difference to us whether a child’s share of the expenses is paid personally or through an authorized distribution from that child’s trust. What matters is that each family branch accepts its fair share of the financial responsibility.
We do not intend that one child should routinely bear another child’s share simply because that child is more financially successful or uses the home more frequently.
We also do not want a child who seldom visits to conclude that the obligation to contribute should disappear merely because the home is not being used.
The property must be maintained whether it is occupied or vacant.
Insurance must be paid.
Taxes must be paid.
Repairs must be made.
And the home must remain safe and ready for family use.
These obligations benefit the entire family by preserving the home for present and future generations.
We hope our children will approach these contributions in that spirit.
If a child experiences genuine financial hardship, we would encourage the trustee and family members to consider reasonable arrangements consistent with the trust agreement.
But we would not want temporary accommodations to undermine the general principle of equal responsibility.
Our hope is that this arrangement will encourage a sense of shared ownership, commitment, and pride in preserving the home.
Family Cooperation Is More Important Than the Property
Regardless of which financial arrangement is selected, we want to emphasize something that is more important than any provision concerning expenses or scheduling.
We do not want the vacation home to become a source of conflict.
We have all heard stories about families who inherited vacation properties and eventually became divided over money, use, maintenance, or disagreements about whether the property should be sold.
We hope that will never happen to our family.
The purpose of preserving this home is to strengthen your relationships, not damage them.
If disagreements arise, we ask that you approach them with patience and respect.
Be willing to compromise.
Listen to one another.
Recognize that no individual family member should always get everything they want.
And remember that a disagreement over a vacation home is rarely worth damaging a relationship with a brother, sister, cousin, or other loved one.
We encourage the trustee to establish reasonable procedures for resolving disputes and, when appropriate, to involve an independent mediator.
We would rather see a scheduling disagreement resolved through compromise than allow it to become a lasting family grievance.
If the vacation home ever becomes more important to you than your relationships with one another, then the purpose for which we preserved it will have been lost.
Our Wishes to the Trustee Regarding Management
To our trustee, we ask that you administer the vacation home trust with an appreciation for the special purpose of this property.
We recognize that holding and managing a shared family residence may be more complicated than administering a conventional investment portfolio.
There may be disagreements.
There may be maintenance emergencies.
There may be requests for improvements, changes in scheduling, or questions about who may use the property.
We ask that you approach these matters with patience, practicality, and reasonable flexibility.
We would welcome the appointment of a property manager or the establishment of a family committee to address routine matters.
We also encourage regular communication with family members concerning significant repairs, anticipated expenses, and decisions affecting the home.
We do not expect every family member to agree with every decision.
But we hope everyone will feel that their views have been heard and considered.
Above all, we ask that you remember that the trust exists to facilitate the family’s continued enjoyment of the property.
It should not become so administratively burdensome or restrictive that family members lose their enthusiasm for using it.
When the Family Grows
We recognize that the family will change over time.
Our children will become grandparents.
Our grandchildren will establish families of their own.
Future generations may include many individuals with different interests, lifestyles, and financial circumstances.
The arrangements that work well today may not work equally well decades from now.
We therefore encourage the trustee to review the procedures governing use and management of the home periodically.
We hope that reasonable adjustments can be made without compromising the central purpose of the trust.
We also recognize that questions may arise regarding the use of the property by spouses, partners, guests, and more distant descendants.
We ask that these matters be addressed with generosity and common sense, consistent with the governing trust agreement.
Our goal is to create a welcoming family environment, not an unnecessarily complicated set of restrictions.
If the Home Can No Longer Be Preserved
Although we strongly desire that the vacation home remain in the family, we recognize that circumstances may eventually make continued ownership impractical.
The property may require expenditures that are no longer financially reasonable.
The home may become unsuitable for continued use.
Or future generations may no longer share the same desire to preserve it.
We do not want the trustee to sell the property merely because doing so would be financially advantageous.
We would prefer that reasonable alternatives be explored first.
But neither do we want the family compelled to preserve the property at the expense of its financial security or personal relationships.
We have therefore provided in the trust agreement for the circumstances under which the property may be sold or otherwise disposed of.
We ask that those provisions be followed with particular sensitivity to the emotional significance of the home.
If the property must eventually be sold, we hope the family will remember that the relationships and memories created there are not lost simply because the physical property is no longer owned.
Our Final Wishes to Our Children
My Dear Children,
When we think about the vacation home, we do not think about its market value.
We think about you.
We think about the time we spent together, the experiences we shared, and the memories that have become such an important part of our lives.
We know that, as the years pass, you will have your own families, responsibilities, and priorities.
We hope you will continue to make time for one another.
We hope the vacation home will give you a reason to gather, celebrate, relax, and enjoy the company of your family.
We hope your children will develop close relationships with their cousins.
We hope future generations will hear stories about the family members who came before them.
And we hope that, many years from now, the home will still be filled with the same warmth, laughter, and sense of belonging that made it so special to us.
Please remember that we are not asking you to preserve the house simply because it mattered to us.
We are giving you the opportunity to make it meaningful to you.
Use it.
Enjoy it.
Take care of it.
Be generous with one another.
And never allow disagreements about money, scheduling, or personal preferences to overshadow the reasons we wanted the home to remain in the family.
We hope the vacation home will remain a place where the family comes together, not merely a property the family owns together.
That is the legacy we wish to leave.